Life is a Journey~
"Nothing on earth can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude" -- Thomas Jefferson
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Blossoming is a part of Life!
Are you where you want to be in your personal life? Are you holding on to your past failures? Has someone abused you, whether physically or emotionally? Do you blame others for your present situation you are in? Are you in a relationship that keeps you paralized from becomeing the person you know you are meant to be? How many times have you told yourself NO one will ever hurt me again? "The strongest oak of the forest is not the one that is protected from the storm and hidden from the sun. It's the one that stands in the open where it is compelled to struggle for its existence against the winds and rains and the scorching sun."
- Napoleon Hill
Life is a journey, with every step we create our destiny.
With every decision we chart our course....
There is something about turning 40 that shifts feelings, causes a person to question their lifes, and think about things more deeply.
I have had alot of ups and downs, a great deal of Joy, a season of sadness, a battle of depression, a struggle that has brought me to this place that I am in right now. ---Jill Christine
"If you want to know your past - look into your present conditions. If you want to know your future - look into your present actions."
-- Buddhist Saying
I am a Hair Stylist... I have been doing Hair for 24 years. I Love doing hair. I have Master'd my craft. I especially Love doing color, and foils. I am an artist.. Fo Sure!
Love art, GOTHIC, Dark pictures, and well, alot of interesting stuff. ~~I offer friendship, and support to women, whether they are single, or married, in relationships, or just life in general, support and Friendship...
~FEW get passed the walls I have built up around myself. Not everyone understands me. I am the class clown, and am sarcastic, YET~ I can be sensitive, I can feel passive agressive digs others may throw my way. Only my closest friends who have earned my hard-to-get trust know who I really am inside. I can get depressed and not always know why.
When someone turns to me when they need advice, I sometimes can be empathetic, other times, I can be impatient with the person who seeks advice, when really the person wants others to feel sorry for them, or if they have no intention on listening. People who want to hear me tickle their ear, with the pitty party they live in. I want to say "Own your shit man, do the right thing. Even if it means you were wrong, be a BIG person, say your sorry, and change!"
I have lost all patience with pursuing people that take my friendship for granted. I am no longer wasting anymore of my time!
I have no tolerance for FOOLS! A FOOL is someone who TALKS to hear them self talk, and someone who is out for ONLY their self! I do not have patience for someone who is manipulitive. I Dispise being used, set~up or manipulated. I can sence it, I can feel it! I won't have anything to do with it.
Despite my impassive exterior and high seemingly unbreachable walls, inside I really am a caring, lovng, giving good, fun, person, full of compassion and love, if only people would dare take a chance and try to get through my hard, tough shell. I may be VERY resistant.. .I feel Respect is earned, I give Respect where it is due, and to those who deserve it. I give RESPECT when it is EARNED.
I am in Love with a man that has been my Rock, my strong arm, and my soul mate.
I have a 21 year old step son, who has grown into a very dear young man. We have 3 dogs. Harley, Hannah and Sugar.
I am the one that the little children are always drawn to, because they know I'll never let anything hurt them, and I always am a candy junkie for them....The kids all know where the candy is in our house... I have the gift of Discerment and at times, alot of times, I am very intuitive.. Sometimes it is even scary what I can see or sense from a person, or what I can almost see that is going to maybe happen.. I am a pretty good judge of character, and I sometimes come in contact with those who get under my skin, rub me the wrong way, and people who just irritate the piss out of me.....I have been pretty right on the money on most things, and situations....The power to see objects or events that cannot be perceived by the normal five senses....
My husband and I tried to have a child together. My husband had a reversal vesectamy, Yeh, he LOVES me guys! But, after 3 diffrent surgeries, fertility drugs, tears, emotional roller coaster ride, and arguments between hubby and I. I decided that I would lay my desire at the feet of my GOD.
I struggled with so many emotions. I just couldn't understand WHY I went thru all of this pain and NOTHING to show from it. I was bitter for many years. I wantted to be a Mommy so bad, I could taste it. I felt empty, I felt like I was nutured, and not female. I felt like a failure. I felt abandoned by my creator. I felt so much, and all of those emotions threw me into a very deep depression, and I turned my back on what I thought was truth. I felt cheated, and I felt defeated. Life Sucked, and I told GOD, (I mean I screamed at him,) "LEAVE ME ALONE!"
What I am about to say is something that I have come to Know, and Embrace. It took many years of therapy, alot of blood, sweat and tears. I was able to Resolve my inner rift with GOD, and come to the revelation, *Having a child does not make me any more of a whole woman, I had to struggle with GOD to get to this place, where I have an inner peace and an inner contentment about who I am. Having a baby, and being a Mom does not define me.
Being content is not an over night experience, as much as forgiving someone is not an immediate emotion. Being resolve to work hard at any thing involves committment enduance, and patience.
Once you decide to go down that path, it will never be easy. At times, it seems like there is NO light at the end of the tunnel. BUT.... there is a glimmer, if not at times, there seems to be a ray of light in a very far distance. So you may ask, how do you feel about not being able to have a child? Well, I am on the other side and here to tell you that GOD has used that suffering for the good. At this point, I have no regrets. I am Thankful for my life. My past has made me a better person. I am still growing as a person, there are things about myself that lure their ugly head. But.... I am still on a journey. I am content....
Thank GOD!
"The pessimist borrows trouble; the optimist lends encouragement."
- William Arthur Ward
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